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Ruth Nicholas

Hear Me

Releasing my inner voice

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From a very young age I learned the difference between being seen, verses being heard. I discovered that unless I open my mouth to say something people will assume what I am thinking just by looking at me.

This realization hit me one day when I was perhaps 6 or 7 years of age. I was at a family function desperately wanting to play with this . . .

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September 30, 2016

What Is

I lie on this twin bed.

Now my marital bed, once my sister-in-law's... who is now 32.

Hundreds of fluffy white clouds parade the blue wallpapered walls.

Teenage posters and album covers, faces of the famous, hang before me. Some sag and buckle with the weariness of time. Smears of blue tack streak from their corners.

A dejected pine . . .

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August 21, 2016

Dead End

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Our time in New Orleans has come to an end.

In fact, we have literally hit a dead end! Our apartment complex backs up to the levee... a monstrous grey wall that has stared at us in mocking silence every day since last September. Imploring us to open our eyes and see that we have actually hit a wall.

Until a few weeks ago we have remained . . .

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July 08, 2016

A Perfectionist's Battle

I spent four hours yesterday rewriting a post I'd written and published on my blog six months ago. Then today I read it, hated it, and switched it back to its original version. Meanwhile I'm still not 100% happy with it...

I am totally perplexed why I would waste so much precious time agonizing over an old post, especially since there . . .

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June 25, 2016

Get up, Get dressed, Get out!

Time for a System Re-boot

This morning I was feeling stuck.

Totally immobilized from stress overwhelm. There were a zillion things I should have been doing but the stress took top billing. All I could think was to call on the wisdom of my mother-in-law.

And her advice?

Get up, Get dressed, Get out!

It was that simple. So I did.

It was a breezy day today in New . . .

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Posted in: my journal

October 21, 2015

Resilience

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Today I am practicing,

Resilience.

Throw at me all you got.

Belittle my quirks. Undermine my abilities. Tread on my polite demeanor and quiet disposition. Even scoff my logic.

It wont change anything.

My worth is still my worth. It is not measured by your judgement.

So please, go ahead...

I'm stronger than you think.

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September 12, 2015

Final Straw

Let the climb begin...

My husband and I rarely fight these days but with fists cocked for weeks now, my time had arrived.

In the Walgreen's parking lot no less.

I stared into our bag of purchases, absolutely flabbergasted. Frantically I searched for the receipt, yelling unapolagetically,

Who spends $89 in Walgreens?!

It made no sense. A bag of candy and . . .

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Posted in: my journal

September 01, 2015

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